Shutting Down Body Shaming: Reclaiming Your Worth Beyond Appearances

Whether it’s a sly comment about your body’s shape or some unsolicited input about what you’re eating, dealing with body shaming in all its covert (and not-so-covert) forms is utterly infuriating. Those little digs and judgments can really chip away at your self-esteem over time.

 And the worst part? These toxic remarks often come from the people you’d least expect. Somehow friends, family members, partners and even complete strangers can feel entitled to critique your appearance and habits. It’s an outrageous reality that no-one should have to put up with. So, what can you do to reclaim your worth and shut down the body shamers?

1 Prepare Your Armour

The truth is, you can’t always control when and where you’ll be subjected to body shaming, and this can feel every bit as unjust and hurtful as the shaming itself. However, what you can control is your internal armour. Think of it as a strong, protective framework that will defend you against others’ cruelty, stopping you from internalising their unkind words.

Even if it’s buried at your core, you may be able to find the small part of you that knows you are so much more than your physical body. Your worth is about the brilliance of your mind, the strength of your character, your passions, talents, and generous spirit. Describing yourself solely based on your physical aesthetics or habits is severely misguided and short-sighted.

If someone body shames you, remember it says more about their own character than it does about you.

2 Find Powerful Mantras

As much as it might make you squirm inside, adopting powerful mantras can be transformative. If you face body shaming remarks, tell yourself:

“My body and appearance do not define me or my worth.”

“I am a kind person worthy of respect and love, regardless of how my body looks.”

 Choose mantras that ground you in your value as a person, and remember that your body and your value are not linked. 

 When other people try to belittle or mock you based on your appearance, they’re displaying their own insecurities and hang-ups. Their misguided attempts at cutting you down reveal vastly more about their own issues than anything about you. If anyone says anything negative, stay centred on your own worth and you’ll stop shame creeping in.

3 Set Firm Boundaries

Of course, having a steady stream of positive self-talk is great, but you’ll likely still encounter body shamers who have become experts at poking at insecurities. When that happens, it’s perfectly acceptable to establish firm boundaries and refuse to tolerate their mistreatment of you.

If someone makes a comment that is rude, inappropriate, or upsetting, have a firm retort ready, or try responding with one of the following:

“Comments about my body are off-limits and offensive.”

“Your thoughts on my appearance were not asked for and are not welcome.”

“The next body shaming remark will end this conversation.”

If they continue to disrespect your boundaries, it’s time to fully disengage. You’ve already told them that they’ve crossed a line, so now it’s time to protect yourself by leaving the conversation. This is relevant whether the shaming occurs in person or online.

4 Build a Body Positive Community

Ultimately, cultivating your rock-solid self-worth is an inside job. However, having outside support and a body-positive community around you can be invaluable.

Seek out friends, family members, partners, mentors and online communities or groups who see the beauty in all bodies – including the lumps, bumps, curves, scars, and quirks. These are the voices that should be amplified, not the ones spewing toxicity about physical appearances.

Spend more time around body-neutral and body-positive people. Follow social accounts celebrating diverse body types and abilities without judgement. Make it known that you have zero tolerance for shaming of any kind.

Final Thoughts

The more you immerse yourself in environments promoting unconditional self-love and respect, the less breathing room you’ll give to body shamers in your life. Because at the end of the day, the only opinion about your body that truly matters is the one you choose to have about yourself. Spend time celebrating all that your body can do, and start deflecting negative noise away.